Silverlace Evening


July 24, 2007, 8:17 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

Well, I just got back from an amazing trip to California.  My brother Cort and his fiancee Melissa, myself and my non-blood brother Jason drove out to Northern California first on the way to Los Angeles for my brother Erik’s wedding.  It was a long and really hot drive until Oregon, which is a refreshingly beautiful state, and then we made it to the ocean and to the Redwood Forest.  Those trees are breathtaking in real life, no picture does them justice.  It was great to get into the Pacific again and feel the saltwater in my hair and on my body.  On the way down south from the Redwoods we stopped in Mendocino, CA, one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever been to.  We took highway 1 down from San Francisco and that drive kept me smiling most of the time.  As we came out of the forest and met the coast, we were immersed in a thick sea fog.  I took some pictures which I will post if I get the chance to.  We met all kinds of awesome people out on the coast, relaxed, liberal personalities that I found no trouble jiving with.  Mendocino is awesome among other reasons because they stress organic produce and meat, hand-manufactured products and a healthy-relaxed lifestyle.  I could see myself spending some more time there in the future.  Jason and I met some cool Oregon girls in Mendocino, Nicole and Hardy, who were biking from Portland to San Francisco.  We ran into them again down in Manchester, CA, and they camped by us.  We had a nice time, even though it poured on us all night and we didn’t have a tent. 

There was so much that happened on that trip!  We got to Los Angeles and it was great to see my brothers Erik and Kirk who live out there.  We met up with a bunch of Erik’s friends and drove deep into Angeles National Forest where we camped out at about 7000 feet elevation for Erik’s bachelor party.  I tell you, God made a beautiful creation.  I love just gazing upon His wonderful creation.  Erik and Jeanne’s wedding was really nice to go to, I was very happy for them and I am stoked to have a new sister-in-law, especially one that is everything that Jeanne is. 

And now back to the daily grind where I face some trying times.  Thanks be to God for the life I have been given so far.

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June 24, 2007, 7:48 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

How about a little “if” “then”…

If I find myself ontologically disposed to a nature of erotic (meaning passionate) love then is it merely bad habits that cause me to hate and be violent?

If the nature of reality is communion with the Trinity then is there no such thing as a bad task, but merely tasks that by degree vary in their worth?

If mary jane is illegal in the US, then why do you get incarcerated in Iowa and kissed in California?

If you wake up somewhat strung out from too much alcohol the night before, then why make the same mistake twice (and why do so many people do it?)?



June 18, 2007, 9:22 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

I am writing this post on the topic of identity.  It may seem like a basic question that need not be asked, but as I live and move in this world I find myself desiring to be a certain type of person.  So who am I?  I am a man, created in the image of God.  I am a son of divorced parents, a brother of three brothers, an ex-boyfriend four times over.  I worship God on Sundays with Christ Community Church, a Mennonite congregation.  I was baptized Easter 2006.  I am a Philosophy and Psychology double-major at Drake University in Des Moines, IA.  I am a shift-supervisor/coffee master at Starbucks in downtown Des Moines.  After awhile this listing becomes jumbled, confused and I begin to despair…just what the hell am I really?!  I am an American, an Iowan, a college dropout at one time.  I was in a band for about three to four years called Cardboard Canary.  We played all over Iowa, a show in Phoenix, and had connections building up in Los Angeles where I lived for a year. 

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I think I need to try this identity question again.  I am a Christian.  I grew up in a non-denominational ‘mega-church’ in Des Moines.  When I was a senior in high school I started going to an evangelical-free ‘mega-church’ along with the non-denominational one.  I kind of stopped going to church when I graduated and moved to Iowa State University to get a liberal arts degree.  Actually I went to Iowa State so I wouldn’t have to work because I hated working more than school.  Then I got fed up with school and dropped out.  My band ‘moved’ to Los Angeles, except they ended up not moving and I just stayed out there with my brother for a year when the band alerted me that they were not coming.  I smoked a lot of weed, drank a bit, tripped on mushrooms a few times, did some coke a few times, and didn’t eat a whole lot because I was pretty poor and too stubborn to work more.  I was also 19.  So I moved back to Iowa so that I wouldn’t die.  I was pretty depressed out there, mostly because my band quit and at that time I thought that music with that band was my ‘calling’.  I was pretty pissed off at God because I thought He was jerking me around. 

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So, back in Iowa I had no direction at all.  I was simply existing.  I worked so I could eat and pay off some student loans, but I was desperately looking for a reason to live.  My older brother had been hanging out with some middle-age church guys at various coffee-shops and bars and invited me to come hang out and partake in some conversation with them.  I had a few questions for them like “If I am a ‘saved’ Christian, why shouldn’t I just kill myself and get to heaven now?  Why wait?”  I figured God would accomplish His will either way, with or without me, so I wanted out of life.  After meeting with these guys for a while I began to realize that the conceptions I had of Christianity were leading me into a miserable life and that what they had to offer may be better.  So I found out that they belonged to a Mennonite Church called Christ Community Church.  I went for a few Sundays to check it out.  I thought it was wierd at first.  They followed a lectionary, worshipped with a classic ‘catholic’ liturgy and did this thing called house church.  I thought house church was cool.  We would gather in smaller groups at people’s houses and connect over lunch.  I entered their catechism, which was longer than I had anticipated, a year, and it culminated in my baptism on Easter.

I am a Mennonite Christian, unhappy about the denominationalization of the Church, but entering the conversation for inter-denominational reconciliation from a Mennonite perspective.  As a part of this messy-broken thing called Church, I believe that God is using the Church to bring forth his kingdom to restore the world to right relationship with God and with man.  Sometimes I don’t see how this is possible, but I believe that God loves his creation and will patiently and lovingly bring about redemption.  I want to be on board, and I think that among other things it consists of ‘rehearsing the grain of the universe’ with other Christians on Sundays and as a part of that community bearing witness to the self-giving Love of Jesus with each other and with those outside our community, including our neighbor and our enemy.  Its hard, it sucks sometimes, but I think that because God is a Trinity of Divine communion it is the shape of reality for man to be in relation with other people and to give ourselves to one another in self-giving love.

So, after a long post on identity I leave with the hopes of moving “further up and further in” (CS Lewis) to the life of God.